Fear Of Flying...

So a really close fried of mine, one of the best dudes I know, Ed Lee sent me a link on facebook for a Nina Simone song “Come Ye” and on the post he also had a motivation countdown tip for 2011: "The hero and the victim both possess the same fear, but the hero is one that ACTS in spite of fear" He who has no fear ....is truly free." In looking at this plus the YouTube video http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AcCZ7WYlzbs (Nina mentions that No fear = Freedom) I was inspired to think of myself and the fears I have. More importantly, I commented to him that not only did I think back to what fears may have held me back from things in the past, but what uncovered or deep seated fears that I don’t even recognize are holding me back now (DEEP…I had to pat myself on the back for that one ).
Now if you ask my mother, I’m pretty fearless, I mean I don’t have some of the common fears like heights, water, dogs, etc. I think nothing of going wherever, doing anything (including riding a motorcycle, swimming in the middle of the ocean, flying all over the place, shooting a gun, thinking of applying to the FBI..). I don’t think I’ve ever actually shared most of my fears with anyone, and in doing that I hold a lot upon myself with no one to help me overcome them, which in itself is a whole nother entry, but for the most part, I have some pretty deep seated fears-fear of failure, fear of being destitute, fear of rejection, fear of being alone my whole life and growing old with no one (not even children)…I truly believe that some of these fears have kept me from moving forward in multiple avenues of my life whether I realized it at the time or not. Regardless to what we may believe, I’m sure that our past experiences whether good or bad, either decreases or increases our fears and thus impacts our actions moving forward but how long do we let those experiences cloud our judgment and keep us from jumping in the air to see if we can fly?

What exactly makes us fear flying? I’m not talking about in a literal sense but in a sense that if I take a step, in the dark, with no fear I may actually fly and soar higher than I expected? Are we more scared that we won’t make it or that we will? I gotta tell you, whether it’s a good or bad thing for me, I have so much passion in me about things that I truly want, that I take it really hard when things don’t work out (see fear of failure and rejection above). Let me give you an example, I mean on one hand I got it together, I have my award speeches ready (NAACP Image, Black Girls Rock, Essence, Trumpet, etc) lol, I have the passion for what I want to do and can relay that to others (Non-Profit for Inner City Youth from Single Parent Homes & Scholarship fund/program), I have the intelligence and probably all the connections (Thank You FAMU), but on the other hand I am stuck at the edge of the cliff of “should I do it/just do it” staring into nothingness wondering if I jump off will I plummet to the bottom like a concrete boulder or fly like an Eagle? FEAR OF THE UNKNOWN…there’s another one-we can never be truly free if we consistently fear the unknown, or don’t have the faith in whomever or whatever we believe in that they will guide us to where we need to be and when. I would love to experience total freedom, true unconditional earthly love and living life with absolutely no fear. I know that won’t necessarily be today but I’m tired of being afraid to fly in all aspects of my life. It’s time to leap and see how high I can go, what about you?

I'd really like to know your thoughts so please provide any comments or insights you may have...

Twitter: @FromMySoapBox